[Insert Inspiration Here]

Realization comes at the oddest moments, sometimes. You hear all the time of people having the greatest breakthroughs in the bathroom, tying their shoes, or playing golf. I had such a moment of enlightenment yesterday and although I'm not looking forward to what it means necessarily, I'm glad it happened because it's progress, something I've been a stranger to for a while.

As I said last post, I had an appointment at the Art Institute's culinary school (which I'll admit that I was perhaps too excited about). Not knowing what to expect and with my usual rose tinted optimism, I endured the introduction that was given to me by a late twenties Latino man with too much gel in his spiked up hair; I sat there, smiling, and nodding my head like a silly little school girl at all the right places, adding the occasional "That's cool" when I couldn't think of anything else to say. Yeah, I'll admit that it seemed nice, but with the cost of a single credit being more than my monthly rent, or better yet, what my income is every two weeks, I knew deep down that it probably wasn't going to happen.

Nevertheless, I smiled brightly as I shook the Latino guy's hand on my way out and told him I'd talk to my parents about it. The true realization didn't happen until I got out to my car, though. Just like any other person, I got in and inserted the key, but when I turned it, the van wouldn't start. Great... I tried again only to be rewarded with the same depressing sound of failure. What to do...? Not many of my friends have cars and the ones that do live kind of far away. Thankfully someone was able to come and get me, even if it did take three hours. On top of all that, it started to rain when I hung up the phone. As I sat there, watching the rain from inside my dead, stuffy van I realized that I wasn't going to culinary school. There was something disgustingly poetic about the situation, like my van was my future in the business and its failure to start was a sign (being a Pisces, I see signs everywhere). Maybe I'd get into culinary eventually, and maybe I'd even get to go to culinary school, but not right now (or anytime in the near future). While my mom was here visiting last week she talked a lot about "paying my dues"; guess I haven't paid mine yet.

After my van was shocked back into life I drove home irritated, depressed, and surprisingly relieved. I started to formulate a plan for my immediate future. First of all, I'm going to attend the community college here in Tampa; I will NOT be going into the military. At the community college I will get my associates degree in dental hygiene. That's about as far as my plan extends, but it's better than what I've had previously. So, armed with my new plan I made it home and did what I always do: cook. Tonight was country ribs with a chinese inspired sauce, rice, and oranges. Pretty tasty, if slightly too salty because of the soy sauce. I seem to have that problem a lot with soy sauce getting too salty, must find a way to remedy that...